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Can't  
04:23am 28/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Can’t

Author: BigBadJayne

Characters/Pairings: Implied Jayne/Inara

Warnings/Ratings: PG-16 for adult concepts

Word Count: 151

Disclaimer: Neither own nor make money from. Joss…make more Firefly, please?

Author’s Notes: Heard Mal’s end, this is Jayne’s-

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Quiet and Calm  
11:22am 27/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Quiet and Calm

Author: BigBadJayne

Characters: Jayne Cobb

Warnings/Ratings: R for violence

Word Count: 1,270

Disclaimer: Don’t own `em, don’t make any money off `em. Joss is Boss.

Author’s Notes: Just how did bad can Jayne Cobb be, anyway?

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Losses and Gains  
12:06am 25/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: HELLRAISER: The Will of One- Chapter 10: Losses and Gains
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Pinhead/Kirsty
Warnings/Ratings: R for language and violence.

Word Count: 2,463

Disclaimer: Don’t own them, no money made from this.

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Sometimes Solitude Hurts-  
11:59am 24/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: I would, if only-

Author: BigBadJayne

Characters/Pairings: Mal, implied Jayne/Inara

Warnings/Ratings: PG-18 for mature themes.

Word Count: 126

Disclaimer: Don’t own them, don’t make money off them.

Author’s Notes: Set during the events of 'Out of Gas', after the shuttles have left. What a certain Captain might be thinking, and what’s standing in his way……


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Oy...Brandywine..Birthday Girl!  
06:51am 24/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne
Well well well.....

Another Birthday...

Let's see....what to give...hmmm...
Could wish for World Peace in your name... (nah, boring)
Could wish for more Firefly (getting warmer...now that Joss is 'free')

Tell ya what, Have the Best Birthday You Possibly can...because you're you.

And you's Good People. :)

BBJ-

 
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(no subject)  
01:28am 23/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne
My oh my....

Well, Let's just skip to the good stuff.

Jewel Staite. Just saying the words adorable, frankly funny and all around shiny would not be enough. (Hey some of you might be old hat at these cons, but when it comes to meeting BDH's, I ain't) her reactions to questions about her shoe collection were rather interesting (but then why some fans want to know what shoes she wears the most escapes even my sensibilities)

Similar questions about the afore-mentioned tailpipe incident (which apparently outed Adam as the culprit-as Jewel was somewhat shocked by the knowledge) were met with howls. And according to Jewel, Sean Maher is not the wallflower that people seem to think he was in the crew.
Asked by one fan what she would have liked to see happen to Kaylee in Serenity 2...she replied "Be pregnant, and starting a family on the ship."
How can anyone argue with that? :) Just floored me how genuinely charming she was.

Mark Sheppard completely disarmed me. At once very relaxed but incredibly witty, he scored so many laughs with the crowd my face ached. The comment about him wishing Badger had gotten a chance to explore that like of River, while creepy in one sense, seemed completely logical in another. His quick and funny responses to how people addressed him were really a hit.

Geoffrey Mandel of QMX gave a presentation on a new Serenity project... Cut-away views of Serenity, the Mule, and both shuttles left a lot of us in the audience open-mouthed with appreciation. Really, some amazing stuff. I for one can't wait.

A presentation on Browncoats: Redemption...the fan film had me wanting more. Well damn near salivating would be a better description. Look for the trailer on the web come next week. their site is
www.browncoatsmovie.com
Seriously. Check it out folks. These guys were awesome!

Last but certainly not least....Alan Tudyk...

My face still freaking hurts, people, from all the laughter today. Firstly...two chairs had been set up on stage...and I was hoping..so greatly hoping the reports were not true, that Nathan was going to be there after all...but then Alan informed us sadly that was not the case.
He then brought out someone to take Nathan's place (as if this could ever be accomplished)...

Or rather..something... Nathan's 7 layer dip.....

No, really... in a pyrex dish, on the chair next to Alan...sat a 7 layer bean, cheese, guacamole and Buddha knows what else layer dip, with two bags of chips. Which Alan confessed to opening and sampling. His intention was to allow the dip the chance to answer questions directed at Nathan....
Laughs didn't die down for a full minute.
As Alan both answered questions and asked trivia of those who had asked him first, He "cleaned house" (his words) by rewarding the ones who answered or didn't with his own swag from at least five films he'd worked on, all signed by him. His responses were hysterical and I know see why he is so loved by the fans who come to see him.
The trivia session was interrupted...by a call from Nathan himself...who blithely asked if Alan had seen a bean dip he'd left in his fridge when Alan had visited him earlier this week...
(Roars of laughter from the crowd...)
Alan, true to form denied anything and told Nathan he probably ate it and forgot.

Gang..this dish had to be 8X10 at least...one mean eating that much bean dip would be heard from space afterwards....

Nathan told Alan not to do anything with his dip and talk to him tomorrow about it.

The dip was later auctioned off , along with some more Alan swag for the whopping sum of $300! all to Nathan's chairty.

So...ticket to con...ridiculous.
Parking fees for hotel... outrageous.

Knowing I'm not going to forget this weekend for the rest of my life......priceless.
 
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Serenity Con Report-  
01:39am 22/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne
Man, am I bushed. :)

Got to the con and registered (really, Creation, times are hard, maybe you could lower your freaking prices for a bit?) and the con got off to a bang with Yan and Rafael Feldman (Fanty and Mingo from the BDH, but you guys know that already-) who were very engaging and completely hilarious, mugged shamelessly, and both did a wonderful impression of Christopher Walken that had to be seen to be believed.

Also a really funny but over the top bit about their participation with a producer from the Vagina Monologues... Yan is a bad, bad, man- and completely unapologetic about it :)

Quantum Mechanics unveiled some very cool stuff for lovers of the `Verse in general, more of Serenity's "equipment" and anyone interested in a certain card game played on the show will be very interested to check out their site in the next few months. Can't say any more `cause they swore us to secrecy..LOL, but really they have some very shing things ahead for us Browncoats...

Adam Baldwin.... Man's a charmer. Very funny, he gave great Q&A and made us laugh while trying to tell us the difference between weapons...and Guns..... A really hilarious moment about weho is smarter, Jayne or Casey, and a moment about Jayne's hots for Inara...
(the quote was something like "Just look at her *points to Morena's banner as Inara on the wall* she's ..well just look... She's kinda hooker with a heart of stone, but she's perfect for Jayne because she's classy...and well...it wouldn't last long, but those few weeks would be HOT")

Much laughter ensued.

And people wonder why I write that pairing.... with quotes like that, it damn near writes itself. :)

Morena Baccarin... Well..just..ummm.....shaddap....I got words....
Really sweet and funny, told some great stories about Nathan and his constant mugging, the ripped pants, and Adam screwing around with Nathan's brand new car.
Still not so sure about the fact that a girl who turns me on also now creeps me out...but ...good with the bad I suppose......
gonna shut up now, cause if I don't I'm like to squee like a 12 year old girl, and that just ain't appealing.... not outta me anyway :)

More tomorrow on Day 2.

Still flyin', out in the Black-

BBJ-
 
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Contest Winner Fic-  
10:13pm 20/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Valentine’s Snow
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: River/Jayne
Warnings/Ratings:  Uh-uh, cause that’s a dead giveaway. It’s me, there’s no Reavers, it’s Rayne…what would you expect? 

Word Count: 2,293

Disclaimer:  Don’t own them; don’t make money off them, just get to make them do smutty things in my spare time.

Author’s Notes:  Written for Adverbia, winner of the Gemini Croquets contest, LOL.  In response to Snow Has No Derivative, which can be found here: http://adverbia.livejournal.com/9862.html

 

          

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And the winner is.....  
08:35pm 15/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

"I've been glared at by editors, by screenwriters..I've been glared at by professionals.."
LOL
I will write a custom fic to the first person who can tell me the movie I just paraphrased that from.... and good luck with that. :)

Well kids, the winner of that is Adverbia, who correctly guessed "The Wind and the Lion" though really, I think she was coached. :)

One custom fic coming your way- and seeing as I already know the choice.....

The answer in a couple of days.

Really. I work quick with this much caffeine floating through my brain. :)
 
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Pasts Resurrected  
10:34am 14/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: HELLRAISER: The Will of One- Chapter 9: Pasts Resurrected

Author: BigBadJayne

Characters/Pairings: Pinhead/Kirsty

Warnings/Ratings: NC-17 for well…the usual things this rating is for. Sex, violence, torture.

Word Count: 2,666

Disclaimer: No, No, and yes.

Author’s Notes: In the absence of light, darkness prevails.

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Dark Mirror 2.0  
09:16pm 13/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne
Dark Mirror 2.0 With apologies to those who posted. I hope I found the problem, by changing the order of play. Also, the First Sarah Mclachlan song may have been corrupted....

Again...apologies to the commenters.

 
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Daddy Dearest  
07:04am 13/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: HELLRAISER: The Will of One-Chapter 8: Daddy Dearest
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Pinhead/Kirsty
Warnings/Ratings: NC-21 for violence and depravity, incest. Not office friendly, and again, not for the squeamish.

Word Count: 2,364

Disclaimer: I don’t own them or make money from them.

Author’s Notes: This is the tough one, folks. How far is too far?

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Realms of Delight  
08:47pm 12/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: HELLRAISER: The Will of One-Chapter 7:  Realms of Delight
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Pinhead/ Kirsty
Warnings/Ratings: NC-21 for extreme violence, bloodshed (buckets, people) and torture. Not for the squeamish

Word Count: 2,305

Disclaimer: I don’t own them, don’t make any money from them.

Author’s Notes:  When nightmares come true, what refuge is the mind’s sanity?

 

 

 
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Reconcile the Demons  
05:28pm 12/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Reconcile the Demons
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Jayne/Inara
Warnings/Ratings: PG-18 for mature themes: Character Death.

Word Count: 1,105

Disclaimer: Don’t, Don’t, no ruttin’ way I ever will.

Author’s Notes: What a Muse song played repeatedly in one day will do to a writer.

 
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Shoppin'  
01:17pm 12/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Shoppin’
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Jayne/Kaylee
Warnings/Ratings: Tough one. How does one rate a Red Light District? By the hour? J I’ll go with hard PG-17. For descriptive naughtiness.

Word Count: As long as they let me post it, who gorram cares?

Disclaimer: I don’t own ‘em, but they’d be working if I did….Joss?

Author’s Notes: By special request for MercsGoodGirl….who asked “What would happen if Jayne took Kaylee slumming?”

 
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The Black Pope  
11:11am 12/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

HELLRAISER: The Will of One -Chapter 6: The Black Pope
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Pinhead/Kirsty
Warnings/Ratings: Really, if you’re reading this, you should know by now. Adults only.

Word Count:  1,908

Disclaimer: I do not own them; I do not make money from this. All characters with the exception of O/C’s are the creation of Clive Barker.

Author’s Notes: One should not play in corners that are too dark.

 

  

 

 

   

 

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Tools of the Trade  
09:21pm 11/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: HELLRAISER: The Will of One: Chapter 5: Tools of the trade.
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/pairings: Pinhead/Kirsty
Warnings/Ratings:  R for sexual description.
Word Count: 2,361

Disclaimer: Standard disclaimer applies. I don’t, they don’t, and no damn way.

Author’s Notes:  Everyone needs someone. Even if only for a while.


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Gettin' it on, Final.  
09:17am 11/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: Suppertime
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: Jayne/Kaylee
Warnings/Ratings: NC-18  for sexual situations and whatnot. Not office friendly. Ain't kidding neither.
Word Count: 918

Disclaimers: Don’t own `em, don’t make money off `em…..

Author’s Notes:  Last of the Gettin’ it on series.

Let the icon licking commence J   

 

 

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Anyone who gives a......  
12:45am 10/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne
I got this from truthmaker, who just friended me. So there's who to blame-

The tag was 33 things people don't know about you.

1. Can you cook?
Hell yes. And damn good I might add. But Thanksgiving dinner....uh....*picks up phone* what was the number again?
2. What was your dream growing up?
Honestly? to be an actor.
3. What talent do you wish you had?
Gonna have to go with playing the guitar. The other one I want is too filthy.
4. Favorite place?
San Francisco.
5. Favorite vegetable?
Asparagus. With lemon pepper.
6. What was the last book you read?
reading Outlander by Diana Gabaldon..comments will not get you invited to the save BBJ picnic-
7. What zodiac sign are you ?
Pisces
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
Yes.
9. Worst Habit?
Driving too fast. And nervous laughter. And procrastination. And self doubt. And lousy friggin' typing skills.
10. Do we know each other outside of lj?
Not to my knowledge
11. What is your favorite sport?
Kendo. Yes it is.
12. Negative or Optimistic attitude?
Optimistic with a smattering of cynicism.
13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
Start a conversation, use the emergency phone, anything. Don't like elevators, actually.
14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
Was almost shark bait. Really. Well that's the one I'm gonna say pubically, anyway.
15. Tell me one weird fact about you:
I can find a movie quote for almost every situation.
16. Do you have any pets?
A tortoise-shell colored cat named Kaylee....What?
17. Do you know how to do the macerana?
Yes. But I won't under any circumstances.
18. What time is it where you are now?
1:05 AM PST
19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
One word. Pennywise.
20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
hahahahahahaha! No.
21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
Really?....conscience.
22. What color eyes do you have?
Steel Blue.
23. Ever been arrested?
Yes.
24. Bottle or Draft?
Any damn way it comes to me.
25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
Move.
26. What kind of bubble gum do you prefer to chew?
Bazooka Joe
27. What 's your favorite bar to hang at?
Anyone with good drinks.
28. Do you believe in ghosts?
My Aunt says hello.
29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
PG,R, or NC-17? Specify.
30. Do you swear a lot?
Ask anyone I write with. Fuck yes I swear.
31. Biggest pet peeve?
Revealing my own stupidity.
32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
Decent. But misguided. (I'm a writer and you give me ONE word?)
33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?
Yeah. Sure. :)
 
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Gettin' it on, Part 2  
07:21pm 09/11/2009
 
 
bigbadjayne

Title: In Hiding
Author: BigBadJayne
Characters/Pairings: River/Jayne
Warnings/Ratings:  PG-18 for sensual references.
Word Count: 901

Disclaimer: Don’t own ‘em, don’t make no money off ‘em…

Author’s Notes:  Part 2 of the ‘Gettin’ it on’ series. Set two weeks after the events of No Heroes Here.

 

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